Ode to Coffee
(senior year, Notre Dame)
Coffee is good, coffee is great
Dark black elixir my spirits elate!
Theorems and code and circuits create
Confusion only caffeine can alleviate.
What then would I do without coffee bean
I fear such a shortage would, in fact, mean
the end of the world! Oh, what horrors I see
Were coffee suddenly to cease to be.
So send me the brew, fresh-pressed and pure
That I could press on and still endure:
When sleep is sparse and workload unyielding
Yet I march on, my coffee-mug wielding.
Ode to MacBook Delete Key
(to a friend whose delete (backspace) key died)
Oh, MacBook keyboard, thy power so great
Vertical columns slanted, though thy rows are so straight
Upon flat surface of thine my digit-tips frolic
Entering alphanumeric data for which thy keys are symbolic.
Until on fateful day, Delete-key dies --
Inevitable mistake leads to frantic cries!
Bringing about utter panic and great despair --
Magic fix -- to find one! Oh, I know not where...
But then, vision clears, all is seen plainly:
Delete-key failure is simply evil plot -- mainly
To force, by frustration, mistake-making typist
Into perfection, with no mistakes even the slightest.
And so with this knowledge, I grimly accept my fate
Until the day when working keyboard will my spirits elate.
Ode to Potato
(this one is slightly older, and the meter is a bit rough; sorry)
Potato, Potato, upon your flesh I feast
Not desiring ill health or famine in the least
But rather spirital and gastrointestinal fulfillment
Only obtained upon potato-feast instillment.
Oh, rough brownish skin does so toughly enclose
The inner goods so fragile; it takes no repose.
Until upon insertion of Sacred Knife, then pristine,
Does the surface of skin become no longer clean.
For Sacred Knife pierces deeply Potato-food,
Harnessing starchy energy, uplifting human mood.
Sacrificial Spud valiantly lies still
As disemboweled spud-flesh pleases all, hurts nil.
Potato-Ritual this greatness declares
Dealing generously potato-related wares
As High Priests/Priestesses proclaim,
"Let all Spuds everywhere bask in eternal fame!"
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Limerick o' Multithreaded Programming
A developer knew not his thread safety
And he lived until he was eighty.
Every day of his life
Global data gave strife
Said he, "this problem is weighty!"
Limerick for Undergrad Thesis
And then, his thesis completed
His data and code he deleted.
But along came advisor
And said 'twould be wiser
If results could again be repeated!
Limerick o' the Confused Software Developer
There once was a confused developer,
The questions they did envelop 'er.
Till one day the code
Did as it was told
And confusion no longer deadlock'd her.
Limerick upon Graduating from Notre Dame
And so, his degree completed,
Work ethic soundly depleted,
He said farewell to the Dome
Then freely did roam
'Till grad school his woes repeated.
Limerick for Front Page of Present Website Repeated Here for Completeness
There once was a webpage unsightly
Chris Fallin did not code it rightly
So he revised it true
With a nice background hue
And showed his true colors forthrightly.
Ode to College
(in the second week of freshman year)
Collegiate life, decidedly great,
Sleep schedule arbitrary, though erring toward late;
Upon these new froshlings great pleasure brings
The plethora of possibilities with which University rings.
Though showers be at times unclean,
And against solid objects the drunk often lean,
It is safe to declare to all who will listen
That in the shining light of college, life doth glisten.
And so under Dome so golden,
These truths in ode-form beholden,
With great pride these words I write
To immortalize the glorious college delight.
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